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Lighten the Fuck Up! Nun For Me, Thanks...

A young nun and an older priest, both who had always honored their vows of charity, chastity, poverty, and obedience, while dedicating their entire lives to serving the church, set out on a mission to help feed the hungry and comfort the sick. But, in order to reach those in need, they first had to cross the Sahara desert on a rented camel... 

During the third day of their journey, the camel suddenly became lethargic and dropped dead without warning, dropping its two passengers violently on the ground. After dusting themselves off, the nun and the priest surveyed their dismal situation... 

After a long period of silence, the priest spoke, "Well sister, this looks pretty grim." "I know, father, I don't think it's likely that we can survive more than a day or two in this hot sun..." "I agree, sister, and since we are unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you be kind enough to do something for me?" "Anything, father..." "I have never seen a woman's breasts before and I was wondering if I might see yours..." "Well, under these extreme circumstances I don't see that it would be sinful if you just took a peek..."

Peter Dazeley. Getty Images.

The young nun opened her habit and the priest enjoyed the sight of her shapely breasts, commenting frequently on their incredible beauty. "Sister, would you mind if I touched them?" She consented and he delightfully fondled them for several minutes... 

"Father, could I now ask something of you?" "Yes, sister..." "I have never seen a man's penis before, I was wondering if I might see yours... " "I suppose that would be okay given our circumstances," the priest replied just before lifting his robe... 

"Oh, it's quite magnificent father, would you mind if I touched it?" The priest, realizing this may be the end of their lives, consented, and after only a few minutes of the nun fondling his penis, he became fully erect... 

Unable to control his worldly desires any longer he explained in a desperate voice, "Sister, you know that if I insert my penis in the right place, it can give life." "Is that true father?" "Yes it is, sister", the priest panted... The young nun paused and then brusquely replied, "Then why don't you stick it up the camel's ass so we can get the hell out of here!"

* Vindog has been repurposing jokes since 1968