Apparently This Gorilla Has All The Chicks In Japan Cumming Their Panties

CNN – Who could resist that striking countenance, that chiseled brow — and that toned, furry butt?

A surprisingly hunky male gorilla, Shabani, has female humans going ape after mugshots of the 18-year-old animal began going viral on Twitter. Zoo officials tell CNN that young women have been flocking to see the pretty primate, who lives at the Higashiyama Zoo and Botanical Gardens in Nagoya. Want to catch a glimpse of Shabani? Get in line. About 100 admirers constantly surround his exhibit, shouting “Look at me, Shabani!” and “This way, Shabani!” whenever he comes out.

Well get a load of our boy Shabani over here. Your newly appointed Mayor of Cuckhold City. Homeboy has chicks flocking in from all Japan just throwing themselves at him and trying to rove him rong time. He’s the biggest hit in Japan since Hiroshima. This guy? This guy fucks. And not gonna lie, I can kinda see what’s getting all these little Japanese chicks so hot and bothered. That’s a good looking gorilla. Has that mysteriously handsome look to him. There’s no other way around it. Dude is probably packing some serious heat downstairs too. Which you know is a major upgrade to those pixelated dongs the girls in Japan are used to dealing with. So yeah, Shabani is the king of the castle right now and living the life. Best part about it? Our guy already has himself two main bitches. “According to officials, the gorilla has two wives, Ai and Nene.” Never been more jealous of a gorilla in my life. Slinging that meat around 24/7. That’s what Shabani does.