Did Someone Order The OBJ Special?

The #2! The Poo Poo Platter! Whatever joke you want to make, this is flat out GROSS. Except for maybe one person.....

Look, unless this delivery was for one Odell Beckham Jr, who filled in the "Special Requests?" line on the app by asking the driver to take a dump before dropping it off, then this is the grossest thing I've ever seen in my life. Bathrooms and food do not mix. No exceptions. I wouldn't even take a closed bottle of water into the entire restroom, let alone food into the stall. So please God let that be an empty bag in there, even though that is STILL gross. Can we get an old fashioned middle school bathroom stall shoe check on this guy? We need to know who this and what is happening. This could be / should be a felony. Assault.

Listen, I'm not trying to slander Uber Eats here, or even Door Dash or Grub Hub or whatever for that matter, because you cannot blame an entire company on a couple loose cannons. But this picture is direct evidence as to why I do not get my food delivered by a third party. You guys can do your own thing, but I have two legs and I have a car. I can manage on my own. And while it would be convenient to get my food brought right to my apartment door, you simply do not know what your driver is going to do. There are some craaaaaazy people out there these days. You never know what someone is going through, whether that be an extreme case of diarrhea or resisting an extreme urge to dip their testicles in your salsa. I was always taught that a bird in the hand is better than two in the bush. And I was also taught that my food tastes better when it doesn't smell like shit or make you immediately shit. Which is why I don't eat White Castle.