Does This Look Like the Face Of An 82 Year Old Dude Who Slashed A Lady's Tires Because She Sat In His Favorite Seat At Bingo?

LAKE WALES, Fla. – Police have arrested an 82-year-old Lake Wales man for slashing a woman’s tires because he claimed she was sitting in his favorite bingo seat. Fred Smith was charged with criminal mischief last Monday when police say he took an ice pick to 88-year-old Ethel Britt’s van during a weekly bingo game at the Lake Ashton Retirement Community Club House. Police say Smith stormed out of the bingo hall and punctured two of Britt’s tires because she was sitting in a chair he usually sits in. Smith was caught on surveillance video in the act.

There is playing Bingo and then there is playing Bingo. This motherfucker was playing Bingo. I’m not even exaggerating when I say I hope I’m like this guy when I’m old. Seriously this all I hope for in life. That when I’m 82 years old I still care about shit. I still have passion. That when Ethel sits in my favorite bingo seat I don’t let her get away with it like a chump. I storm out of the bingo hall and slash her tires with an ice pick. Not so tough anymore huh Ethel?

PS – I don’t know anything about this Ethel chick but what’s she doing still driving anyway? Probably thinks she’s hot shit cause she still has her license. Probably thinks she’s above the law and can just sit anywhere she wants on Bingo night. I mean let’s cut the shit. She knew she exactly what she was doing when she sat in Fred’s favorite seat. Guy had probably sat there for 7 years straight every single bingo night. This was no accident. About time somebody took her down a few notches.  Hey Ethel you better not show up at Shuffleboard next week unless you want to catch a beating you skank.