Wake Up With Some Stone Cold Stunners

Trysta Krick8/20/2020 2:12 PM

Clickbait Krick here… Just here for the jokes and the views. Wanting to get these quick wise cracks off. As a nod to my friend Barstool Nate, I’ll be including various nearly naked women at the end of this blog.

Yesterday was a WILD day. Here at Barstool, we’ll often work on things for weeks at a time and then all of a sudden shit all drops at once. So my Wednesday broke down as follows.

First came the launch of Stool Slang on Jared Carrabis and the Origin of the Rocket:

Then a blog about what a FRAUD the Lakers are:

And finally, a 3MT with Chief’s wide receiver Tyreek Hill:

One of these things is not like the other LOL.

Listen, I do my research. I know about Tyreek’s background, and the reaction was somewhat expected. People calling for me to be cancelled, to delete the video, to ask the HARD HITTING questions (LOL this is fucking Barstool Sports). None of that is happening. So nothing happened that was unexpected. Except this:

Now you expect to be attacked by outsiders, but I can side with Dave on this in that it’s bananaland to have a coworker come at you in public. But if you know anything about Nate’s background, this is par for the course. I wasn’t upset.

But it did get me thinking … about the subject of hypocrisy.

I won’t get into the hypocrisy surrounding how people deal with those who go through the criminal justice system because it’s not funny in the least and as Dave is quick to point out, we are a comedy site.

But what I will do, because it’s VERY funny, is point out the hypocrisy of my friend Eric Nathan.

Nate can dislike the idea of Tyreek Hill being on 3MT. It’s America, after all. But where was Nate when Mike Tyson, a convicted rapist, was interviewed? When Don King, a convicted murderer, was in Barstool HQ? Or Michael Vick, he of insane amounts of dog abuse, was also interviewed?

Funny, I didn’t see him tweet about any of that.

But what I did see him tweet about was Stone Cold Steve Austin. A LOT. Almost eight years of tweets.

Nate LOVES him some Stone Cold. So do I. Nothing like the Texas Rattlesnake delivering a Stone Cold Stunner to get the blood up.

In fact, who wouldn’t love Steve Aus …. ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shitttttt.

Hold the phone. This isn’t an attempt to smear Stone Cold. But the man “hit [his wife Debra] on the head, back, and legs, and then stormed out of the house before police arrived.” He was arrested and pleaded “No Contest” to the charges, ultimately receiving probation and a fine. Austin did not get into further trouble with the law, served his probation, and has by all accounts become a great asset to our society since that night. Like Nate, I love me some Stone Cold.

But my question is this … where was Nate’s outrage over Stone Cold’s domestic violence? LOL there wasn’t any.

KRICKETS. Chirp Chirp.

Because as a society we pick and choose what to be outraged by. Tyreek Hill pleaded guilty to a terrible charge at the age of 20 (BTW Stone Cold was 38 when he was arrested, just sayin’). Recent charges about child abuse were investigated by local and state authorities

AND NFL officials

AND not only was he exonerated he was given full custody of his children, and has been monitored by state officials since without a single negative incident.

You are more than welcome to hate Tyreek Hill, or Stone Cold Steve Austin, or any other figure that has run afoul of the law. It’s human nature. But at least admit you’re being a hypocrite when you do it. You pick and choose who you forgive. Most people do.

All of this leads up to the subject of redemption, which I also won’t get into because unlike Barstool Nate and his hypocrisy, it’s also not really funny. But the truth is that redemption is a universal value we seem to only save for those who align with our beliefs. In a perfect world, those who serve their penance should be fully forgiven for their crimes, especially if they show growth and a changing of their ways. We don’t live in a perfect world, and there will always be those who hold people to different moral standards for one reason or another.

I’m not here to say hypocrisy is a common trait of Nate’s, but I reached out to my friend Clickbait Smits for advice, and he sent me the following blog he wrote, of which I was unaware.

Apparently, Nate called out the ENTIRE Barstool office for not working hard, claiming his “page views” dominated everyone else, and then (apparently) got badly exposed as being a person who pumped his own blogs on the main page. Wild, I know, for someone who seems to almost exclusively blog tits and ass. And then, apparently again (I wasn’t here at the time, mind you), Clickbait Smits started blogging just like Nate (lots of tig ol’ bitties) and doubled Nate’s page count in a very short period of time.

Interesting! And very hypocritical. LOL

But I’m not here to start a feud. I like Nate a lot. I liked him so much I made him the focus of an episode of Stool Slang entitled The History of the Spider Monkey:

It's a really interesting insight into Nate and the origins of his Spider Monkey persona. Give it a view, I think you’ll like it. There’s even a Nate at Night reference. I heard it was ELECTRIC.

Since all promotion is good promotion at this company, to show how much I care about Nate and him getting his due shine, here’s a video of some of the Stool Slang moments that were left on the cutting room floor.

As a nod to my fried Nate, here are some mostly naked women. Clicks for days Baby!