Barstool March Madness TV Tournament - Second Round Voting Now Open
First round votes are IN. About 7,100 voters in all. Oddly enough there are different vote totals for different matchups so that means some people are voting on certain games but not others which is straight up lunatic behavior. Who fills out only a portion of a bracket?? For the most part chalk but here are the upsets: (and at the bottom are the total vote and percentage breakdown of all the match ups and round 2 voting)
8. Corey Matthews over 9. Shawn Hunter – Yea I know Corey was the 8 seed and the favorite, but you are a LOSER if you voted for Corey over Shawn so I guess the upset is how many losers out there are voting.
10. Frank Gallagher over 7. Sam Malone – This is straight up a timing thing. Portnoy and Rear Ads probably would flip the fuck out if they knew Sam Malone was a first round exit. But Shameless is popular in 2015 and to be perfectly fair, William H. Macy is incredible as Frank. I know this isnt a serious bracket about acting but fair is fair that character is incredible
12. Uncle Jesse over 5. Fonz – To be honest without guys like The Fonz there arent guys like Jesse Katsopolis. Fonie pretty much invented cool on television. But Uncle Jesse took that torch and ran with it. Hes in a band – Jesse and the Rippers. Owns a club – the Smash Club. Has a smoke wife – Aunt Becky. Incredible flow. And a catch phrase that has withstood the test of time. Have Mercy. I’ll be perfectly honest I made him a 12 seed because of the classic 12 v 5 upset.
9. Fresh Prince over 8. Zack Morris – Because A) Stoolies are a bunch white-guilt-voting-asses and B) Black Twitter got ahold of this bracket yesterday afternoon and I think they realized there was only like 4 black people total and they needed a couple wins. I myself would take Zack Morris no doubt about it. Hurts to lose the Fresh Prince of Bel Air but Zack was a 90s God. Landed the hottest TV chick of the 90s Kelly Kapowski and he was the ultimate schemer. But Will Smith ran away with it. Wasnt even close
(8) Zack Morris 2009 25.60%
(9) Fresh Prince 5133 65.50%
And the big upset of the day….
13. Dr. House over 4. Ben Linus – Are you fucking kidding me? I mean honest is this for real??? I thought there must have been some fuck up in the voting. Nope, there it is in plain numbers:
(4) Ben Linus 3263 41.60%
(13) Dr. House 3777 48.20%
Atrocious. Ben Linus was one of the best villains of all time. A true diabolical mastermind (or so he thought) with a heart made of stone and a brain bigger than everyone elses combined. Include that prick Dr. House. Ben Linus would have been able to diagnose all those idiot patients and he would have just told them the wrong medication to watch them die slow. Because thats how sick he was. More importantly, if you cant tell by now, I rigged this entire thing for good first and second round match ups and this COMPLETELY RUINS my Gus Fring v Ben Linus showdown. So fuck you guys, you ruined my whole plan.
Here are the figures for the rest of the matchups:
(1) Walter White 6954 88.70%
(16) Jonathan Turner 249 3.20%
(8) Corey Matthews 3848 49.10%
(9) Shawn Hunter 3244 41.40%
(5) Dexter 4965 63.30%
(12) MacGuyver 2190 27.90%
(4) Jesse Pinkman 5846 74.60%
(13) Jack Donaghy 1300 16.60%
(6) Charlie Kelly 5623 71.70%
(11) Buster Bluth 1483 18.90% (SHOCKED by how much of a landslide this was. Thought it would be much closer)
(3) Coach Taylor 4418 56.30%
(14) Phil Dunphy 2732 34.80%
(7) Sam Malone 3447 44%
(10) Frank Gallagher 3573 45.60%
(2) Gob Bluth 4901 62.50%
(15) Adam DeMamp 2174 27.70%
(1) Homer Simpson 5429 69.20%
(16) Uncle Phil 1748 22.30%
(8) Carrie Mathison 3651 46.60%
(9) Olivia Pope 3347 42.70%
(5) Larry David 4071 51.90%
(12) Ari Gold 3098 39.50%
(4) Hank Moody 3635 46.40%
(13) Al Bundy 3430 43.70%
(6) Tim Riggins 3995 51%
(11) Barney Stinson 3136 40%
(3) Tyrion Lannister 5500 70.10%
(14) Rick Grimes 1597 20.40%
(7) Eric Cartman 4801 61.20%
(10) Stewie Griffin 2408 30.70%
(2) Jack Bauer 6459 82.40%
(15) Mulder Fox 656 8.40%
(1) George Costanza 6408 81.70%
(16) Chandler Bing 1200 15.30%
(8) Mr. Feeney 5428 69.20%
(9) Mr. Belding 1725 22% (NO love for Belding. Wow.)
(5) The Fonz 2456 31.30%
(12) Uncle Jesse 4701 60%
(4) Rust Cohle 5743 73.20%
(13) Trinity Killer 1283 16.40%
(6) Kramer 4508 57.50%
(11) Kenny Powers 2668 34%
(3) Frank Underwood 6417 81.80%
(14) President Bartlet 684 8.70% (The manipulative shark massacres the bleeding heart liberal)
(7) Jax Teller 5358 68.30%
(10) Tommy Shelby 1679 21.40% (I can understand why this happened, but give it a couple years and you will laugh at the fact that you ever voted for Jax Teller over Tommy Shelby. Tommy Shelby is on the Walter White/Tony Soprano level)
(2) Don Draper 5810 74.10%
(15) Harvey Specter 1260 16.10%
(1) Tony Soprano 6423 81.90%
(16) Steve Urkel 717 9.10%
(8) Zack Morris 2009 25.60%
(9) Fresh Prince 5133 65.50%
(5) Gus Fring 4083 52.10%
(12) Tim ‘Toolman’ Taylor 3014 38.40% (Timmy Taylor gave him a good run)
(4) Ben Linus 3263 41.60%
(13) Dr. House 3777 48.20%
(6) Mike Ehrmantraut 5535 70.60%
(11) Vic Mackey 1457 18.60% (Not enough people have watched the Shield. Go watch it. Season 5 can go toe to toe with any season of any show)
(3) Omar Little 5347 68.20%
(14) Will McAvoy 1674 21.30% (Will McAvoy had Omar on his show and tried to get all Sorkin on him and talk really fast and Omar just blasted him in the face with his shotgun)
(7) Dwight Shrute 4039 51.50%
(10) Ron Swanson 3148 40.10%
(2) Michael Scott 6978 89%
(15) Selina Meyer 223 2.80% (Michael Scott with the largest margin of victory in the first round)
Second Round Voting Now Open: