The Videos Of The Krakatoa Volcano Exploding And Shooting Lava Everywhere Are Absolutely Insane

It looks like Mother Nature got wind of coronavirus possibly slowing down and decided she'd join the end of the world party out of boredom. No one succumbs to FOMO more than Mother Nature. Enter Krakatoa. 

I feel like the only time I hear the name 'Krakaota' is when someone makes a reference to a giant sound or explosion in an "oh shit" kind of way. If Krakatoa is mentioned you best be far away from that conversation. That's because big K is the name of one of the most power volcanoes on Earth. In 1883 it killed over 36,000 people when it erupted in Indonesia. For any of our long time stoolies in Krakatoa remember the wise words of Jack Handey during these times: if you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone. 

So yeah that's what we're dealing with. The videos of Krakatoa are INSANE. 

Volcanoes themselves are crazy. It's just a mountain that explodes off the top and spews lava. They're equally as terrifying as mesmerizing. Lava looks so pretty and cool on TV, but in reality it'll cause you to melt and disappear. Not ideal. 

I thought I knew everything there was to know about volcanoes through movies like Dante's Peak and Volcano, but boy was I wrong. Apparently we've got lightning in volcanos now. Look at this fucking picture. LIGHTNING! 

I mean what are we supposed to do with that? How can we defeat a lightning volcano? Mother Nature is just showing off now like an asshole. 

I'm fully expecting King Ghidorah to appear out of the frozen depths of the Antarctic and call Krakatoa home in the next few days. Based everything else that's happening in 2020 this is only the next logical step.  

Advertisement

If corona was the starting pitcher of the 'End Of The World' game I'd say Krakatoa is the 6th inning man coming in to get some quick outs. That means it's almost time for the asteroid to start stretching in the pen for the 9th.

Crazy late night fun fact but the sound of the Krakatoa explosion was the loudest sound ever recorded in the history of the planet. It was heard 3,000 miles away. If I hear something from another state that's a problem. There were people across OCEANS that heard this shit. 

P.S. When the dude in the movie Volcano jumped from the subway and got melted to death by lava I legitimately thought he died filming the movie. I stopped watching the movie and immediately started crying says my mom. She had to explain to me what actors were right then and there otherwise I was never going to recover. I was likely dropped on my head at any early age.