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The Wire Cross: FPHL Coach Hops Onto The Ice And Into Opponents Bench To Fight A Player. Naturally, Chaos Ensues

I gotta be honest, I'm a little torn here. I mean on the one hand this is obviously a total clown show move. Think we can all agree on that one. But on the other hand, it's the Federal Prospects Hockey League so who really gives a shit, ya know? It's not like they're setting a bad example for youth hockey. It's not like they're hurting the development of any players who have a legitimate chance of having a career in hockey. If this were at any youth level, junior level, the ECHL or anything like that then yeah this would be an enormous issue. But it's the FHL which is more or less a glorified beer league so we can all relax a little on the idea that these guys are disgracing the game of hockey. Most people don't even know the league exists so I think hockey will be fine even with this going on. 

So with that being the case, let's just take this absurdity for what it is--incredible theater for everybody. 

First up you had the jacket toss. Right then and there was the cue for everyone in the crowd that the wires had officially been crossed. As soon as the jackets came off, everyone in that barn knew that they were in for a scene. And sure, it helps when the jacket isn't constricting your arms to toss some absolute bombs during a scrap. But let's not act like that was the only reason for taking off their jackets pre-fight. Keep in mind, this is the FHL so I can't imagine these coaches have a massive wardrobe to wear behind the bench. Chances are these are their only good suits so they can't run the risk of ripping their only good jacket in a scrap here. 

Next up you get the hardo on the Columbus team who decides to drop the mitts and put on a show trying to square up with the Carolina coach. 

It's 9:40am EST right now. How many times do you think this dude has already called someone a "fuckin' pussy" so far this morning? I'll conservatively set the O/u at 17.5 just because there's a chance he only woke up like 20 minutes ago. This meat head might go down as the MVP of the whole incident here since things seemed like they would have cooled down pretty quickly if he didn't go ahead and escalate that shit 0-100. Coincidentally, probably the only MVP he's ever won in his entire life so I'm happy for the guy. 

But my dark horse pick for MVP is this fucking bozo right here who went full kamikaze out of the box. 

What an idiot! What a fucking idiot! This lunatic comes flying out of the penalty box, tosses his helmet off and then gets absolutely DROPPED right away. Perhaps the worst sneak attack I've ever seen in my life. Maybe he was drunk? Maybe he just threw on a pair of skates for the first time in his life a few weeks ago? Who knows. All I do know is that it perfectly sums up everything you need to know about the FPHL. 

Oh and I haven't even mentioned the fact yet that the Carolina coach went full tarps off at the end of the scrap there. That wasn't for the fight. That's just so he could show off the bod to hopefully score a couple of kills at the bar postgame. Legend. Total clown for sure, but a legendary clown nevertheless. 

UPDATE: More angles!!!

@BarstoolJordie