Dolittle: Not The Worst Movie Ever Made, But It's Certainly Not Good!
Robert Downey Jr.'s first movie since departing from the Marvel Cinematic Universe is an apparent steaming pile of trash. But, are the rumors true? We found out...
Dr. John Dolittle lives in solitude behind the high walls of his lush manor in 19th-century England. His only companionship comes from an array of exotic animals that he speaks to on a daily basis. But when young Queen Victoria becomes gravely ill, the eccentric doctor and his furry friends embark on an epic adventure to a mythical island to find the cure. (via Google)
JeffDLowe (35/100): Let’s get this straight: ‘Dolittle’ is a pretty bad movie, but the reports of it being an all-time disaster are a bit exaggerated. While it isn’t as terrible as people made out to be ahead of the release, the movie was very clearly dragged down by major production issues.
The new ‘Dolittle’ was billed as a fantastical adventure, so this really shouldn’t surprise me but, I can’t believe that this version of the story is stranger and more bizarre than the Eddie Murphy movies. Strange can work, there is nothing wrong with a movie that is a bit out there, but ‘Dolittle’ is rather lifeless. A movie without a real strong heart or personality that involves the likes of Robert Downey Jr., Kumail Nanjiani, Emma Thompson, Octavia Spencer, Tom Holland, and more, is a major failure.
The thing that caused those issues and this movie’s downfall? Probably this…
In a pivotal scene in Universal Pictures’ “Dolittle,” hitting theaters Friday, the title character—a doctor, played by Robert Downey Jr., who can converse with animals—relieves an ornery beast’s indigestion by removing debris from its rectum. … Flatulence jokes ensue. The scene was added late in the filmmaking process, one of several efforts Comcast Corp.’s Universal made to try to ensure a return on the $175 million it invested in the family-friendly movie, according to a person close to the production. (via Wall Street Journal)
It’s not just the rectum joke that is a problem, it’s the tinkering with a vision and movie’s structure to try and “save it” or “cater” the movie to a specific audience. Does this tactic work sometimes? Sure, but not often. You can just tell with ‘Dolittle’ that the movie was knocked off course by the studio and in the editing room. It might not have been a great movie, but the pacing and tone of the movie ended up being a complete mess.
What a fucking headache this movie ended up being… $175 million budget and a sub-$60 million debut? Yikes.
There is enough to get through the movie, I will give it that much. And, on top of that, there are far worse movies you could see… especially from Universal Studios! (CATS!!!!) But man oh man, ‘Dolittle’ is still quite the big-budget January flop.
SIDE NOTE: It is very sad to see this end up being Robert Downey Jr.'s first post-Iron Man role. (He did get the bag, though…)
KenJac (47/100): This movie is a very hollow attempt at trying to revive a children's classic, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t entertaining. There is halfway decent visuals, a simple-brain plot, and “okay” acting alongside better voice acting. I didn’t expect much more than that! I saw a lot of critics trying to compare ‘Dolittle’ to Universal's very recent bomb, ‘Cats’, because of the similar failings, but I don’t think that’s fair at all. As I noted on twitter, trying to understand ‘Cats’ was like trying to digest a rubber tire. ‘Dolittle’ is a Happy Meal by comparison.
Instead of doing a traditional breakdown, I’ll just split it into pros and cons.
Pros:
This movie is very clearly meant for kids, and it is incredibly easy to follow.
The voice acting cast is great. Kumail was great but my number 1 favorite was Craig Robinson as the squirrel.
Some of the animals having regular names like Jeff and Kevin made me chuckle every time.
Speaking of humor, I think I audibly laughed like five or six times which is WAY more than I expected based on the reviews.
As I said, the visuals aren’t great but they aren’t distractingly bad to me.
Cons
The ACTUAL acting is, well, bad. I enjoy RDJ’s British acting quite a bit in the Sherlock movies, but his accent in this was atrocious. The child actors are also a non-factor.
The plot being super basic is also sort of a con. There are no surprises to be had.
The Dragons asshole part, which was teased all over by critics, is just as jarring even though I knew it was coming.
There are plenty of cringe-worthy and groaning moments, but that's to be expected in what is, again, a kid's movie.
I think this is a good movie to go to if you have young kids looking for a quick and easy laugh. If you’re an 18-30 bachelor named Matt, like most of our readers are, you probably won’t like it very much.
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The movie is not yet Not Officially Buttered, but it will be because I do not expect good scores from Trillballins and our Audience. Our full review of the movie will drop on Thursday's edition of Lights Camera Barstool. Make sure to rate all 2020 and 2019 movies on a scale of 0-100 in the links below…
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