In Other Blockbuster Mets News, They Traded Two Minor Leaguers For Jake Marisnick Today!

Welcome to Flushing, Big Jake! I know you are seen mostly as a defensive player, any offensive numbers you had over the last few seasons may have been aided by the current biggest scandal in baseball, and the two young players you were traded for had good numbers that would usually drive Mets fans crazy for the team giving up for a possible platoon player (Taylor had a 2.16 ERA while pitching in A, AA, and AAA ball last year while Corona hit .301 in rookie ball).

But today is a new day in Metville. All the pessimistic dark clouds in the sky have given way to our sunny skies now that our savior Steve Cohen has arrived.

I am not going to get upset that the Mets may go into the season with Jake Lagares in center because having an outfielder play the position he is supposed to play, let alone an actual centerfielder than can track fly balls down, is actually a massive upgrade for this franchise and I've always enjoyed a player that can move on the basepaths. However, the Mets could sign Eric Campbell to play the hot corner along with Aaron Heilman to set up the Gasoline Boys in the bullpen and I would be fine with it as long as the story was still riding in the wake of Straight Cash Steve Cohen's arrival. I imagine former Met and longtime Mets fan Paul LoDuca agrees with me on that.

So best of luck in Queens. Jake! If you or your manager have any ideas how to tip the boys off on what pitches are coming at Citi Field, I would truly appreciate it because I'm not sure how long it's going to be until Straight Cash Stevie starts throwing stacks of cash at the problems on this team along with bringing in professionals at every level of the organization to fix what the Wilpons have ruined the last 10 years or so. #LFGM #LFGSC