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Sure, You May Love Fall But Have You Ever Been Arrested For Trying To Fuck A Pile Of Leaves?

Manchester NewsA drunk and drugged up man 'tried to have sex with a pile of leaves' in the car park of a Premier Inn, a court heard.

Michael Golsorkhi was seen 'thrusting' with his trousers around his ankles in full view of families eating at a Beefeater pub in Stockport.

The 26-year-old pulled up his underwear before running away and hiding in bushes after he was confronted by hotel staff...Golsorkhi has now been locked up for eight weeks.

Basics everywhere love to talk about how much they love the fall. They love it because it's boot szn. They love it because it's jacket szn. They love it because it's pumpkin spice szn. They love it because it's cuffing szn. They go on and on and on and on about how much they love autumn. And yeah, I get it. Fall is objectively the best season of the year. Not necessarily for the aforementioned reasons but because it's not hot as fuck outside, nor is it blistering cold, and we also have all 4 major sports going on at the same time. But the fact of the matter is that people love to act like they're the ultimate basic fall betch. 

Let me ask you this question, though--how many times have you ever been arrested for attempting to fuck a pile of leaves? Excuse me, how many times have you ever been arrested for attempting to make sweet, sweet, sensual love to a pile of leaves? Because if the answer is never, then you don't actually love the fall. You might like fall. You might appreciate the weather that comes along with fall. You might enjoy fall activities. But do you really LOVE fall? I'd argue the answer to that is "no" until you actually make love to it. 

@BarstoolJordie