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Knee Jerk Reactions to Week 7: Patriots vs. Jets

Things to consider while admitting that nothing fills me with comfort and joy like Bill Belichick’s “We’re on Prime Time Breaking the Jets Will and Making Their Franchise Quarterback See Ghosts” smile:

–I was asked on Barstool Radio and The Cousins show yesterday how I thought this game would go and told them both I thought the Patriots would crush. Because the last time they played, the Patriots were a muffed punt and a Pick-6 by two rookies away from a 33-0 win on regular rest. And with 11 days to prepare for this one, I wasn’t giving the Jets any shot. But Holy Schniekies, I did not predict this. That they’d disintegrate the Jets down to the molecular level, break the molecules down into their component atoms and then split the atoms.

–Simply put, this is one of the all time most dominating performances in all three phases of the Bradichick Epoch. Up there with 59-0 against the Titans in the snow 10 years ago. The Jets finished with 175 Yards of Total Offense. Sam Darnold finished with a stat line of 11 for 32, 86 Yards, 0 TDs, 4 INTs, 1 Fumble and a Passer Rating of 3.6. That is not a typo. That’s the lowest PR by an opponent in the Dynasty Era. Numbers like that will make any Ghost Hunters’ EVP start pinging like crazy. But that wasn’t ghosts he was seeing. It was Boogeymen.

–I was probably one of about 20 people left in the country still watching past the two minute warning when ESPN showed some of the numbers to put what we’re witnessing into historical context. First, that the Pats currently stand at +175 in Point Differential. To find a team with a figure like that through seven games you have to go back to the Buffalo All Americans. In 1920. And the last time a team had two shutouts on the road while scoring 30 or more? The 1942 Bears, when half the league was off fighting WWII. And I’ll add a stat of my own, which is that they currently lead the league with 18 Interceptions. The No. 2 team is Atlanta. They have nine.

–If you’re sitting there saying, “But what does it matter? It’s only the Jets,” stop right there and explain to me how they just put up 24 points in a win at Dallas against a Cowboys team that is supposed to be a contender in the NFC. Also, if you’re sitting there saying, “But what does it matter? It’s only the Jets,” stop right there and bite me.

–It’s always been weird to me how the networks pick and choose which coaches they’re going to obsess over. For instance, wherever Rob Ryan goes, he gets more TV face time than Ryan Seacrest. But for some reason they’ve decided Jerod Mayo is not a factor on the Pats sidelines. And already they’ve written him out of the season like he’s the Mark Brandanowicz character on “Parks & Rec” and are saying it’s all Belichick. I beg to differ. And maybe if he’d grow his hair out along with a grey goatee and make a demonstrative pissy face every time the scheme he drew up fails, he’d get the recognition he deserves too.

–Irregardless (not a word, I know; I’m using it ironically) of who’s calling the shots, this was the Patriots defense at its most aggressive. Typically we see them come out in a fairly straightforward, throwback 3-4 front, maybe bringing a safety down against a run-heavy offense. Then as the game goes on, they cry “Havoc!” and let slip the dogs of war. But in this one they were let off the leash from the very beginning. And it was brutal to behold.

–This pass rush scheme is a complex, finely tuned machine with built in redundancies all over the place. They can come at you from everywhere across the formation and overwhelm your blockers in one-on-ones. And last night they were selling out with Zero blitzes (meaning everyone up in the box, no deep safeties), getting into Darnold’s head as well as his face and forcing mistakes. Then as the game progressed, they began showing Zero blitz, then dropping out of it, adding to the confusion. By halftime, Darnold was Shaggy, lost in a haunted amusement park. And that was no caretaker in a rubber mask chasing him around.

–Take that first interception. They crowded everyone up to the line and Jamie Collins and Dont’a Hightower defeated what little protection there was, forcing Darnold to panic and hit Devin McCourty with the kind of pop up Little League outfielders throw to each other during warm ups.

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–The fumble on the next possession was the result of an overload blitz by Collins and John Simon, both blitzing the same side, with only Brandon Shell to block both of them. He chose one. Collins. Simon came in free for the strip sack that Kyle Van Noy would’ve had a scoop & score on, were it not for the fact Ryan Griffin accidentally kicked him while he was down. (Proving once again what I always say: That the perfect time to kick a man is when he’s down. It’s as true in life as it is in football.)

–But then as we got into the 2nd quarter, they began showing Zero and then dropping out of it at the snap. In other words, getting less aggressive. Basically doing the opposite of what they’ve put on film for six weeks. So on a 3rd & 10, they stacked the box with the State Worker Front (one guy in a 3-point stance, the rest all standing around watching), but dropped Duron Harmon back into centerfield. They still came with six rushers. Chase Winovich got penetration and Deatrich Wise pressured Darnold despite a blatant hold by Chuma Edoga. But Shaggy (I’m calling him that now) thought he had the deep middle open for a throwaway. He was right in that it was utterly devoid of his receivers. But Harmon was there and had it all the way.

–Then there was that 4th & 4 attempt from the Pats 28 just before the half. Again the D gave a look like they were about to Storm Area 51 before dropping some into coverage. But still caused enough confusion that Adam Butler got a push on the interior lineman (I think it was Brian Winters) to force an incompletion for the turnover on downs.

–Finally there was the Terrance Brooks interception, again out of a one down lineman front with Adam Butler at nose tackle and Collins dropping as Winovich, Hightower and Van Noy rushed. Thoughts and prayers to the Browns coaching staff as they try to figure out which scheme they’ll get next week, the one that unleashes Hell on you sooner, or the one that unleashes Hell on you later.

–The real fun in that one will be watching Stephon Gilmore take on Odell Beckham, Jr. For the second time this season he drew Robby Anderson and it was just no contest. At one point with the score 24-0, Darnold just got tired of not seeing his first option open and tried to hit Anderson on a deep curl, not only with Gilmore in perfect position mirroring his route, but with Harmon in bracket coverage. Gilmore might draw Jarvis Landry, but him against OBJ will be the matchup of the season. The kind of thing they’ll give two minutes to on the Super Bowl 54 DVD.

–JC Jackson had Anderson a lot on the last few drives. And my worry about him is that, as we go further down the path toward the total NBA-ification of pro football, he’s getting more and more reputation calls. I’m not saying he never lays a hand on a receiver; just that he’s getting flags for doing things corners with more pelts on their saddle don’t get. And like with basketball, it becomes a stigma you can’t shake. It happened to him the end of last year too. But to Hell with it. I’d rather have him drawing the occasional DPI or hold than get gun shy. In the meantime, I’ll keep dreaming of a world where they simply call the rule book. Where they judge a man not by the zeros on his contract, but by the content of his coverage. I have a dream.

–I thought Jason McCourty did a respectable job on Demaryius Thomas. That is, until Thomas dropped one of the rare perfect passes from Darnold. And now I’m going back to my original theory: That Belichick sent him to New York to be a sleeper agent and destroy the Jets from within. Prove me wrong.

–I’ve gone on too long without mentioning the jobs both Josh McDaniels and Brady did with what might have been the shallowest skill position depth chart since that epic 2013 comeback win over the Saints when Brady by the end of the game Brady was surrounded by Shane Vereen, Michael Hoomanawanui, Austin Collie and hit Kenbrell Thompkins for the game winner.

–So they opened the game by stretching Adam Gase’s zone coverage horizontally, attacking the edges with jet sweeps, bubble screens and outside zone runs. They converted 3rd downs and at almost nine minutes of the clock. Then finished it off a fake jet sweep and Sony Michel run behind Ben Watson at H-back in an offset I. Watson buried Darryl Roberts for the only block Michel would need to go in untouched. Of course,

–I’m not one to self-promote my own perfectly accurate predictions. But allow me to self-promote my own perfectly accurate prediction after that drive:

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–What followed was the bomb to Phillip Dorsett. The Patriots were in a spread and the Jets had a single high safety with man under. Trumaine Johnson drew Dorsett out in a wide split, and Dorsett got him to flip his hips with a move inside – with the middle of the field closed by the safety, no less – before Dorsett broke to the corner. It was a brilliantly run route, and there’s not a QB in the world who could’ve delivered a better ball. Remember when Rex Ryan defenses used to be like a Rubik’s Cube with 11 squares to a side for Brady? We would’ve killed for two drives like those back then. These are the good old days.

–Not that I’m concerned about Brady’s numbers after a road win where they did the Joker dance down yet another division opponent’s staircase,

… but damn have dropped passes been costing him lately. Last night especially. He had Michel behind a perfect wall of blockers on a perfectly executed screen that ended up on the ground. Edelman dropped one on a great man-beater route that could’ve set up a score just before the half. And a pass dinged off Watson’s face in a way that had me flashing back to when I used to call him by my old high school coach’s nickname for guys with bad hands: “Pizza Paddles.” I’ll be looking forward to the Boston sports radio honks blaming the trend on Joe Judge having to coach the wide receivers and Special Teams at the same time. That’ll be a party.

–As far as the tight ends go, it was about what you’d expect from a recent unretiree who missed a month and a half with a suspension, a release and a re-signing, and Eric Tomlinson, who was so anonymous they kept calling him “No. 82.” Which is better than “Pizza Paddles,” I’ll admit. But they were this close to just calling him “The Other Leading Brand.”

–Watson had that ball off his facemask. Tomlinson lined up at fullback and whiffed on Steve McClendon who blew the play up for a loss. But then Watson had a nice 3rd & 5 route where he threw a chip block before running a shallow cross and converting it. My guess is that’s the first connection by a QB/TE hookup with a combined age of 80. But don’t quote me on that.

–Jakobi Meyers continues to work his way into the Brady Circle of Trust. Five targets, five receptions. None bigger than the nice hands catch he made on an in-cut in the 3rd, reaching out behind Brian Poole. Plus he drew a hold by Poole after beating his off coverage. That one set up the Michel touchdown that made it 24-0 and put the game away. They’re about to add N’Keal Harry and Mohamed Sanu, which is great. But I hope the additions don’t stunt Meyers’ growth because I’m sensing a future where he plays really well throughout his rookie deal before signing with some terrible team for ridiculous money.

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–As far as the other rookies, it was good to get to see Jarrett Stidham not throw a Pick-6. JoeJuan Williams has already been contributing to Special Teams but had a well-timed PBU on Vyncint Smith on the final possession. We finally got a look at Damien Harris, including a 13 yard carry. Granted he finished with 12 yards total, but I’m going to focus on the positive. And yet, with all due respect to Winovich, who I keep forgetting is a rookie, Jake Bailey is their ROTY right now. He not only dropped on punt at the two that took a 90-degree bounce straight out of bounds and another that landed at the one and came straight back like a Phil Mickelson lob wedge shot, he’s also taken over the kickoffs and seems to be able to put it wherever the coaches want. He’s probably already contributed more than any 5th Rounder in the league.

–I don’t know for certain, but I think there’s a rule that says if a coach keeps committing intentional penalties and the other coach keeps declining them, eventually it goes to Trial by Combat. If it’s not the rule, it should be. Get on it, NFL.

–At that point where Shaggy started chucking balls into the cheerleaders, it was an obvious cry for help. One more of those and I would’ve been forced to call the authorities under my duties as a Mandated Reporter.

–This Week’s Applicable Movie Quote:
Sean Milller: “I understand your little girl’s feeling better, eh? Lost her spleen though, eh? Pity, that. Make it mighty tough on her to fight off infection, eh Jacky?”
Jack Ryan: “You sick son of a bitch!”
“Patriot Games”

–McDaniels can cobble together a 33 point offense out of spare players the way Spock once went back in time to the Great Depression and built a working computer out of 1930s radio parts. He had James Ferentz at fullback on one touchdown. Elandon Roberts on another. He put out a Tank personnel grouping (3 TEs, 2 RBs) with Jermaine Eluemunor at left tight end and Tomlinson and Watson on the other side against an 8 man front. And still managed to get four blocking three as Michel punched it in behind Roberts. It’s incredible.

–But I can’t imagine how it’d work without James White. At the end of the 3rd he hada three play sequence where he slipped up the sidelines on a swing pass for 22, broke a tackle in the flat on the opposite side for 6, then sat underneath the middle zone for the 1st to set up that last touchdown. At some point some coordinator is going to dedicate two defenders to just stopping White. But it hasn’t happened yet.

–This reaction by Hightower was the moment of the night that practically nobody saw:

–Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be spending the rest of my day breaking down the “Rise of Skywalker” trailer. Damn you, Disney and Jar Jar Abrams for dropping that in the middle of a working night for me.