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Watching A High As Hell Isaiah Thomas Scooter His Way To Shake Shack Before They Close Is An All Time Thriller

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I am at the edge of my goddamn seat. What an incredible ride that was and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t play with my heart strings.  I know a high motherfucker when I see one and Isaiah is certainly not low. We’ve all seen the look

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Well who among us hasn’t been high at Whole Foods? Now imagine you have infinite funds to buy whatever you want and you tell me who’s living a better life than Isaiah at that moment. After his quesadilla craving was denied he took to the internet to get a recommendation and suddenly it was a battle against the clock. I have no clue where Isaiah is in this video but I do know he’s gotta make a run for it and of course because he’s high as hell he suddenly becomes Jason Bourne when the pressure is at it’s highest. Remember, Isaiah is one of the best clutch and fourth quarter players in the NBA when healthy, so there was little doubt he would find a way.

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Enter the scooter. Fucking genius. Impossible to walk through any city on the planet right now and not see some sort of scooter. Hop on that shit and boom things are looking good. This is the part of the movie where things almost seem like things are going too smoothly, something has to go wrong to cause suspense. Boom, phone is about to die. That’s OK though, once Isaiah starts talking about the food you can tell he instantly doesn’t have a care in the world. His high ass is dreaming of delicious burgers.

Isaiah finally reaching his destination and giving his alias of James was laugh out loud funny. Who doesn’t recognize Isaiah Thomas? Watch 2016 highlights on YouTube for me one time guy. Props to Isaiah for thinking so quick on his feet too despite his very elevated mindset. That’s a man that has done this routine a time or two. He even had the frame of mind to make sure not to forget bacon AND say please because he has manners.

I cannot wait for the sequel. Shit like this makes me so thankful that I am alive during the social media era. Just think, if this was like 15 years ago we would have never seen a high as hell All NBA point guard risk everything for some Shake Shack. If that isn’t living, I dunno what is.

 


P.S.

Kyrie would never