Mama KFC Makes Her Content Debut, Calls The WFAN Morning Show To Say She Wants To Smack Me In The Face

KFC8/22/2019 7:45 PM

Let me give you a quick rundown of Mets World in the last 48 hours:

This dude Greg called Boomer and Gio on the WFAN morning show a couple days ago and hit the world with this JD Davis jingle:

I loved it. Oddly enough, Boomer and Gio didnt like it, but most Mets fans, and pretty much anybody who knows the JG Wentworth jingle, was down with this remix.

Fast forward to later that night, JD Davis walks it off for the Mets, Pete Alonso rips his shirt off, and the whole city has James “JD” “Double Davis” Davis Davis fever:

The next morning, the Morning Show mentions the video I made and the JD Davis jingle, so I called in to tell Gio he’s gotta get on board with the song, because JD Davis has always been and always be, My Guy:

On that call, we chatted about Barstool at the Ballpark, amongst other things, and Gio called me a hypocrite because I said this Saturday at Barstool at the Ballpark is going to be a “playoff like atmosphere,” when I had just chastised Marc Carig of the Athletic for enabling the Wilpon’s with this tweet:

I personally think saying the ballpark atmosphere is going to be that of a “must win” feel, and saying that the 2019 season is a success no matter what happens, are quite different. But nonetheless, I understand the viewpoint that it was hypocritical. I spoke about Meaningful Games In August (#MGIA), which if you listen to the podcast, you know its a tongue in cheek comment about the Wilpon’s loser mentality regarding Meaningful Games In September, and poking fun at this franchise being a perennial loser. But Gio was calling me a hypocrite and you know who else was, too? My own goddam motha:

Et tu, Mother? Cuncel da Family. Somehow WFAN gets my mom on their airwaves before I get her on mine, and she tells them shes gonna smack me in the face. Smh.

We should be talking about this:

And THIS:

And instead I’ve got my mom threatening me with violence, and we got Frank the Tank having a meltdown that hes the Eduardo Saverin of the JD Davis jingle and that Real Black Greg has Zuckerberg’d him:

Frank is mad that he’s not getting credit for the jingle, and he’s citing this on camera meltdown as proof:

Frank, if you were the inventor of facebook, you would have invented facebook.

And as for my motha…I’d like to see her try to smack me in the face. I’ll punch my mother right in the ribs so fucking hard she wont know what to do. I wouldnt closed-fist punch her in the face, I’m not a barbarian. But if she comes at me with her Wilpon enabling nonsense trying to smack me in the face, I will WORK HER with body shots. I’ll dog walk her from the Bronx to the chop shops of Flushing and back. I dont care if its her, if its Marc Carig, if its Greg Giannotti, any Mets fan, or any non-Mets fan – if you cant understand the big picture of the Wilpon’s Reign of Terror leading to skepticism and pessimism and an expectation (and borderline desire) to truly hit rock bottom in order to perhaps, maybe, some how, some way, make ownership feel enough pressure that they will finally stop running this team like a Mickey Mouse Small Market Quadruple A team, then you’re probably not a life long Mets fan. If you cant understand that dynamic and understand that you can still be fan (as a matter of fact, probably a more hardcore fan) while criticizing the team for certain organizational short comings, you’re probably a fan who hasnt lived through much hardship, or you aren’t as irrationally invested as some of the fans who understand the ever-present pessimism that looms over this fanbase. Congratulations to my mom, AKA Benedict Arnold, and all the other fans who never wavered. No doubt about it, this miracle run from Last in the National League (the Marlins arent a real team) to 6 games over and making a playoff push is a little bit sweeter for you than the rest of us fans with brains who can see the big picture, but gave up hope.. I’ll be the guy holding my breath from now until October 1st knowing that this run – whether it results in a playoff appearance/run or not – is enough to make the Wilpons close up the wallets and sit tight with this team as is and not make the moves necessary to put them over the top.

So in that regard, there’s one thing we can all agree on – the next 5-6 weeks is all we got. Double Davis and Pete Alonso and the Flushing Five trying to complete this Miracle Comeback is probably our best shot at winning for the foreseeable future. The Big Picture over the next few seasons is no longer changing, so now its time to focus on the short term and say Lets Fucking Go Mets.

PS – if anybody is ever wondering why I am the way I am, just show them this screengrab: