Report: The Patriots are 'Pissed' at Their Ex-Chaplain Who Started the Nick Caserio War

You, like me, might just assume that with the Patriots Director of Player Personnel Nick Caserio under contract for another year, on a contract that clearly spells out that he can’t talk to other teams about a job, and with the Houston Texans having dropped their blatantly rules-violating tampering of him, that the issue would be dead and buried.

If so, then we’re both guilty of underestimating the Boston media’s ability to turn a nothingburger into a full-on, five-alarm, panic-in-the-streets crisis in which the Patriots are suffering from:

A) Tension
B) Dissension
C) A “rift”
D) A tense, dissension-filled “rift”

First it was Ben Volin, who did his best to start The Purge with a Globe article that went with “A) Tension,” using no less than four variations on “Nick Caserio wants out.”

Which was his reporting for a few hours anyway. Which is how long it took him to backtrack and call those very specific, declarative sentences his “opinion”:

So I answered back and figured that the whole issue, while fun, was pretty much over. Time to move onto the next False Flag manufactured crisis. But every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in:

Volin apparently went on WEEI this morning, ripped into me and changed his opinion about his own opinion. He’s now re-reporting what he first reported but later unreported. I think. I’m not sure. Because like an ever-growing majority of people in this media market, I wasn’t listening. But good for him for backtracking off his original backtrack. If N’Keal Harry can change direction that fluidly the Pats will lead the league in points.

But enough about that. Here’s what we do know about the situation between the Pats and the Tampering Texans. The Patriots are furious. And the object of their ire is their former Team Chaplain/Morality Coordinator Jack Easterby. The man of God who tried to lead Caserio into temptation like a snake in the Garden of Eden.

This is from some actual reporting by Greg Bedard of Boston Sports Journal (subscription):

“[T]he Patriots, or at least certain influential members of the organization, are still plenty miffed with the Texans.

“They are livid,” said one source.

“This totally pissed them off, said another.

New England’s unhappiness toward Houston doesn’t have much to do with the Caserio situation. According to multiple team sources, the Patriots are irate ver the departure of former Team Development Director/Character Coach Jack Easterby. And if certain people in the organization had their way, the Patriots would take it out on the Texans on Dec. 1.

Why? It’s personal. …

[Easterby is] a human with desires. And for Easterby, that includes being a general manager or even higher within an NFL organization. And it’s that understated lust fo r power – and his sesire to be around power – that has left many feeling Easterby is a bit of an opportunist with an agenda. …

Easterby, with his grander aspirations, had to know he had little chance of landing a personnel role under Belichick …  So he began looking for other opportunities. …  Belichick attempted to retain Easterby, but he left for more power, a better title and more opportunity for the Texans. …

He’s not fraud or charlatan. But those aren’t usually the type of people who move around the NFL very often — they hook on with one coach and stick with him. If they depart, it’s usually for a lifetime college job or into the business world for bigger dollars. …

They certainly don’t hire an agent, like Easterby did with Lamonte, who is one of the best in the business at leveraging teams to the benefit of his clients. And you don’t go to a rival in the same conference who could be challenging you in the years to come. Easterby has so much intel on the inner workings, including the thought processes of the Patriots, their coaches and players, that he’s much more valuable than any coach, player or scout switching teams. That’s kind of dirty pool, especially among teams with such close ties. …

Additionally, sources believe Easterby let it be known in the building he was unhappy with Kraft’s legal entanglement. …

The Krafts can tolerate a lot of things, but if you leave for a competitor with state secrets, take issue with some of their personal actions … don’t disrespect their family home by trying to poach someone else on your way out the door.

Jack Easterby, ladies and gentleman. The man who started it all. The Gavrilo Princip who fired the shot that started the Nick Caserio War:

How about the stones on this guy? He’s got the sweetest job in the world. Working for the most successful organization in America. Answering to the boss who’s the most outside-the-box thinker in his profession. Who’s built his staff around hard working, smart, diligent people who come to their jobs from non-traditional backgrounds. And the only people he had to was that boss and his God. The guy had it made.

But he had to be a GM. His sinful pride and lust for personal glory wouldn’t let him settle for just being the chaplain. He wants to go from building a ministry to building a roster. From the New Testament to the Wonderlich Test. From the Holy Trinity to the 3-Cone. The gospel to the gridiron.

And  he realized he was never going to be involved in roster decisions in Foxboro even if he lived as long as Noah. So he hired an agent, took his 30 pieces of silver from Houston and betrayed his mentor. Now we know why a man of faith would turn his back on a mentor who sinned instead of offering him forgiveness and counsel the way the gospels teach. Because his faith is mainly in his career. And his ambition is all that matters. Rules be damned. What a fucking fraud.

And in doing so, he made a very powerful enemy. The Patriots are 10-1 all time against the Texans, by a combined score of 358 to 209, an average of 32.5 to 19 per game. Somebody in the Pats organization wants Easterby’s blood >cough< Jonathan Kraft >cough cough< and that chance comes in Week 13 of the season. Patriots by a million.