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Get A Load Of This Absolute Unit That Lives In Australia

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PN- Knickers the steer is a bit on the shy side, but the bovine behemoth tends to stick out from the herd. As you might have guessed, that is Knickers at the back of the photo — the black and white one with a couple of normal-sized cows sheltering under its belly. Standing 194cm tall and weighing 1.4 tonnes, the seven-year-old Holstein Friesian is unofficially Australia’s biggest steer. While all that bulk makes it hard for Knickers to blend in, being heavier than a family sedan does have its advantages. Third generation Myalup cattle farmer Geoff Pearson said Knickers’ startling size had saved him a trip to the abattoir. “It was too heavy. I wouldn’t be able to put it through a processing facility,” “So I think it will just live happily ever after.” Knickers cost his owners $400. They bought him as a “coach” — an animal that could take charge of the herd and show them the ropes of life on the farm.

Holy shit! What. An. Absolute. Unit. I hope that picture and this story is real but it’s hard to tell with any news out of Australia. They’re just out there on their island doing God only knows what. But if it’s true, this should be the biggest news in the world. Look at that thing! Look at it! Big Dick Energy on a hundred thousand trillion. Knickers should be making all the babies like he’s a stud horse. Think about the kind of milk an offspring of Knickers could produce. That’d be some super duper milk. It’d give you unbreakable bones. To be honest, I can’t stop scrolling up and looking at Knickers. He’s the definition of an absolute unit.

How do you think Knickers is treated by his fellow cow peers? They better not bully him like he’s the ugly duckling or some sort of freak. That would make me furious and sad. I like to think his fellow cow peers treat him like the other elves treated Buddy the Elf in the North Pole. I hope they treat him like he’s one of them. I hope nobody treats him any different than any of the other cows simply because he’s giant. He’s just one of the guys. Think about it. Knickers has no idea he’s a giant behemoth. Knickers has no mirror. He thinks he looks like everyone else and there’s no harm it letting him believe that until the day he dies.