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I Rebranded Myself As A Blanket Merchant And Here Is Why

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Blankets. They’re as old as time is long. In the beginning, a lot of innocent animals had to lose their lives transforming into blankets. A sacrifice to protect cavemen from the biting midnight wind. And unfortunately, I think animals are still dying today.

So how do you reinvent something so ingrained in human culture and interaction? How do you recraft a tool that has already been perfectly molded by time itself? The answer is, you can’t. So you don’t try.

When you look at it on paper, the Barstool blanket is just another blanket. Just another comfortable, cozy fleece blanket. Another way to warm your nap and calm your nerves. A lifelong friend that will be there for you on your best and worst nights. It’s true. On paper, the Barstool blanket is just another blanket.

But the thing is, unless you’re a nerd, life’s not on paper. Life’s a dynamic game that relies on intuition and nuance. So when you choose to relax with a Barstool blanket, you’re showing the rest of your living room exactly the kind of person you are. You’re someone who prioritizes friends and family. You’re saying, “I prefer to bust balls and have a good time instead of toiling over mindless work.” You’re saying, “I want to live forever! I want to be immortal!”

The Barstool blanket is about more than being stylish and warm this fall. It’s about making a statement. A blanket statement.