Advertisement

Armageddon Could Be Upon Us: A Red Cow Has Been Born In Israel For The First Time In 2000 Years

bs-red-cow-28477

The Sun – A bible prophecy predicting the end of days is feared to come true after the first ‘red heifer in 2,000 years’ was born in Israel.

The Temple Institute in Jerusalem announced the calf’s birth on YouTube, saying it would undergo “extensive examination” to determine if it is red all over.

If the female baby cow is found to be “blemish free”, the Institute will declare that the calf “brings the promise of reinstating Biblical purity to the world”.

In both Christianity and Judaism, the red heifer is central to the prediction about the “end of times”.

After sacrificing the red cow, construction can begin on the Third Temple in Jerusalem.

The Temple Institute and other groups worldwide were set up with the goal of building the Third Temple on Mount Moriah, or on the Temple Mount.

Well I guess this is the beginning of the end for the majority of us. I knew something bad was coming. I could feel it in the air. First the Browns ended their losing streak with a tie against Pittsburgh, and now this.

Here’s the thing with this “red heifer” business. It doesn’t matter whether you consider Jesus Christ your lord and savior, or simply a former Jew who jumped ship for greener pastures. Rabbis and priests all agree; if this red cow is found to be unblemished upon further examination, it’s a big fucking deal. It’s a sign from Papa Christ himself. That’s a cool nickname for God I just made up.

First, a completely red cow must be born. Once it’s confirmed to be completely red, because I guess that’s important, it means it’s time for the construction of the “Third Temple in Jerusalem”. After that, it’s fucking judgement day.

In all seriousness, even if you’re not a religious person or find any humor in making jokes about the end of the world, we’re talking about something that hasn’t happened in 2000 years and could very well lead to some very controversial happenings in the middle east.

You see, the Jews have every intention of building this new temple in space currently occupied by “The Dome of the Rock”, a holy islamic temple in Jerusalem. That means that once they confirm this red cow meets all the requirements for sacrifice, they’re gonna destroy this islamic temple of major significance. So even if the world doesn’t actually end, there’s a very good chance the birth of this cow is gonna lead to some big time drama between a few of our planet’s major religions. Not great.

Here’s to hoping that the birth of the “red heifer” doesn’t actually signal the end of life as we know it on Earth, because I saw how “This Is The End” ends, and I don’t think I’m destined for heaven with the Backstreet Boys. I fake sneezed a few too many times during silent prayer at my local synagogue as a child to expect a happy ending to this story.