Tiger Woods Is Clearly, Obviously Back

It’s so clear that Tiger is back. He posted a final round 64 today with nothing close to his best stuff. He had three different putts that somehow, someway didn’t fall. They defied gravity. He began the tournament 3-over through two holes yet through ALL THAT he still finished second in a major championship. He beat all the best players on planet earth except for the hottest major championship performer of the last two years.

You know how I know Tiger is 100% back? Dave is frantically stepping up his trolling. He knows the window is closing. He knows Tiger’s about to shove all Dave’s stupid takes right up his ass. I’d be panicking too if I were Dave. Guy is going on and on about how Brooks Koepka is his favorite player. What desperate, sad little man who knows one of his favorite schticks is slipping through his fingers.

It almost happened at Carnoustie. It was even closer to happening today. It will happen next year — Tiger Woods will win a major championship and continue his assault on Jack Nicklaus’ record.

Everyone knows it. Welcome back, Tiger Fucking Woods.