IHOP Says They Were JK'ing About Becoming A Burger Joint Called IHOB. LOL!!!

MOOD:

Hey IHOP, if that is your real name, you can kiss my grits for pulling this goddamn stunt. I know this was all done to go viral and sell some chopped meat that probably had to go because who the hell goes to IHOP for burgers? But fuck that. You don’t get to tell us what kind of restaurant you are based on what food you want to get rid of that month. That’s what specials are for. You are now a burger joint for the rest of your life. Good luck getting the business of people that are anywhere near a Burger King or Five Guys or Wendy’s or basically any other restaurant on God’s green earth that slings burgers and buns.

You also don’t get to pull a prank like this and try to win us back with 60 cent pancakes. Who needs 60 cent pancakes in their life anyway? Nobody feels good after 4 pancakes. Are you trying to get me to eat as many pancakes as I can fit in my body so I feel even worse than I usually do? Are you trying to kill me? What the FUCK is your problem, IHOP? Excuse me, IHOB. Again, you are IHOB until the day you go out of business because a man’s got to have a code. Luckily for you, that day will come quicker than you think because you are now an average-at-best burger restaurant wayyyy behind all the other restaurants that have been selling beef forever instead of an established name in the breakfast game competing with diners, Waffle House, McDonald’s breakfast, Perkins (shout out Tiger Woods), and whatever Friendly’s God has been nice enough to spare. I miss those clown ice cream sundaes sooooo much.

Can’t forget the Watermelon and Orange desserts with edible “seeds”.

Great, now I want Friendly’s and there aren’t any within 100 miles of me. Fuck you IHOP IHOB!