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The Eliminator: Mariah Carey Songs

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Pick which one of the four you would eliminate

Always Be My Baby:

Dreamlover:

Fantasy:

Honey:

Those four songs are just a reminder of a time when Mariah was churning out superduper hits while also guiding some of us older folks through puberty. A first ballot Hall of Famer as a singer and a smoke. If you were good enough for Derek Jeter in the 90s, you make the Hall. That simple. Heartbreaker could have made this Eliminator as well, but Jay-Z’s verse swings way too much sway. That’s the same reason I didn’t use ODB’s version of Fantasy.

Now when it comes to my pick, I have to eliminate Dreamlover. Always Be My Baby is an absolute jam and is one of the songs guys will sing out loud despite the fact it will makes them look like a huge pussy. The Fantasy video was filmed at Playland and has ODB on the remix, so good luck convincing me to eliminate that. And the Honey video has probably helped pop literally millions of boners to Stoolies that are now over the age of 30. So Dreamlover gots to go. And for the record, I still think Mariah’s best song is All I Want For Christmas Is You. Brings the party to another level every single time it comes on and remains the only Christmas song that is allowed to be played outside of Christmas music season.

But as always, this is a democracy, so you can place your vote below. And don’t mind me, I am going to go watch the Honey video for the 5,000th time today.

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