The Eagles Are Getting Everyone All Charged Up For The Kelly Green Uniforms By Blasting Out A Photo Of DeVonta Smith And His Massive Hog
Here's the thing--that's just a big ol' cock. No two ways about it. DeVonta Smith is packing some serious heat, and there's nothing concealed about this carry.
The entire city of Philadelphia already gets off on the mere sight of kelly green in the first place. It's like a drug to us. You give us the Birds wearing kelly green, and we don't know how to act anymore. But now that the Eagles' official social account is just throwing the Slim Reaper's Not-So-Slim Reaper in everybody's face? On a gosh darn Thursday afternoon? Lincoln Financial Field is about to be the horniest stadium in America on Sunday.
Basically what I'm getting at here is that you might want to have the towel ready, because Shane Bowen and the entire Giants defense is going to be getting a giant load blasted all over their chest by the Eagles offense on Sunday. Courtesy of Smitty and the Gang.
P.S. -- Technically, I'm out on paternity leave right now. But that's not going to stop me from writing a blog about DeVonta Smith's dick.