If You Call Yourself A Red Sox Fan, You're Rooting Your Ass Off Against Cam Schlittler Tonight

This freakin' guy. 

I hope the Blue Jays score 1000 runs off this guy tonight. 

Like, there's part of me that wants to see the Yankees win, force a Game 5, then get their doors blown off in Toronto. But if that means that Cam Schlittler pitches well, I can't have it. 

And look, I didn't know much about this kid until he shoved against the Red Sox last week. 

He was awesome. And if the story ended with him being a Walpole, MA guy that the Sox could have drafted who ended up being really good for the Yankees, that would be one thing. It would be annoying, sure, but it happens. 

Turns out the kid can't help himself. He wins a big game and has to tweet out he's "Drinking Dat Dirty Water." 

Corny. 

Even during the game, he appears to have an issue with Boston. Not a lip reader, but it looks like he says a bad word before saying Boston in that clip. 

So, "F Boston," but I also live there when I'm not playing baseball…got it. I'm sure the B's fans will give you a standing ovation at TD Garden after you mocked the city. 

Then, of course, there's this now-famous exchange with my former Sports Radio WEEI producer and Red Sox Super Fan Lucy Burdge. Now a member of Team DraftKings (and the originator of walking bets), Lucy was just minding her own business before Schlittler decided to become a Reply Guy after he beat the Red Sox. 

Well, he made an enemy for life in Lucy. 

Now we have to read about how getting angry is his superpower, like he's Bruce Banner or something. 

To recap: 

• Mocks Boston. 
• Says "F Boston" (allegedly, I'm not a lip-reader). 
• Goes Reply Guy to belittle a passionate Red Sox fan.  
• The Red Sox could have drafted him.  
• Looks like an insanely good pitcher that could dominate the Red Sox for the next decade. 

If you're a Red Sox fan, tonight's game is shaping up to be an all-time Hate Watch. You lock in to see the Yankees lose to the Blue Jays, get eliminated, and force Hubbs, Tommy, and Marty Mush to cry themselves to sleep. And you root your ass off for the Toronto offense to pummel Cam Schlittler. 

Go Blue Jays.