DWTS Season 34 is Reportedly 'a Shitshow' After Jordon Hudson Bailed at the Last Minute and Hilaria Baldwin Going 'Full Diva'

As Reality TV shows go, Dancing With the Stars isn't necessarily appointment viewing for me. There are seasons they have people I'm interested in, and others that should be called Dancing Done by People You Think You Recognize From That Thing You Might've Seen. For every Kristi Yamaguchi, Erin Andrews or Nicole Scherzinger, lately the show has featured a lot of contestants fished out of the Reality TV recycle bin. Or worse, the bottom feeders from America's Influencer community. 

But what if they had a season where the "Stars" were all acting up, being difficult, and sewing chaos behind the scenes? That I could get behind. And the preseason of DWTS 34 got to a good start when it was revealed last week that Corey Feldman (the second most important Corey in The Lost Boys and License to Drive, after Haim), went AWOL and hadn't been heard from since his name was announced. Well, he was missing until he wasn't. He reported for duty, taking all the oxygen out of that story line. 

If the celebrity gossip sites are to be believed, Feldman's mysterious disappearance sounds like the most normal part of the season that began last night:

Yahoo - Throughout 2025, Bill Belichick’s girlfriend, Jordon Hudson, has been making headlines after headlines for her controversial business moves. ...

And now, insiders claim she was almost a part of season 34 of Dancing with the Stars; but she had some big requests.

In case you missed it, insiders told DailyMail that Hudson was almost a part of the new cast. They said, “Jordon was meant to be on the show, and they were pushing for it for some time. The producers knew they struck gold getting her, but they couldn’t get on the same page.”

And yes, it all went wrong.

“Jordon mentioned she wasn’t interested in doing certain interviews and she wanted to control loads, including picking her dance partner and when to practice, so she could attend games with Bill,” they added. “She also didn’t like the direction that Dancing wanted to take her story because it seemed to be all about controversy, and she wasn’t interested in making it all about her and Bill.”

Insiders also claimed that after Hudson’s slot fell through, they got Fifth Harmony’s Lauren Jauregui to sign on merely two days before the cast was announced.

"Dodged a bullet," you say, Express US News? How about ABC is totally missing out since your average American - and extraordinary ones like myself - have no idea who this woman is, but we are certainly intimately familiar with the romantic partner/ business associate/ coaching assistant/ muse of the head football coach of the UNC Tar Heels. 

Jordon would've put eyeballs on the screen and advertiser's dollars in Disney's coffers. But her man's football program took priority. If the producers of DWTS had any judgement, they'd have accommodated her requests, allowed her enough free time to support her man against UCF this weekend and Clemson the next. And probably gotten Bill to show up in the audience to support her right back, which would've been ratings Unobtainium. But instead, they had to push the issue on the "controversy" instead of letting this strong, independent, accomplished woman dance on her own two stilettos.

And what they've gotten instead? A "Shitshow," at least according to the rumors:

Source -  The new season of Dancing With The Stars is here, and though the show must go on… it’s not easy to cut a rug AND sweep the drama under it! So the Season 34 tea is already starting to spill out, and it does NOT taste good so far!

We already heard Hilaria Baldwin was being a diva from her first step — and was furious she got paired with Gleb Savchenko instead of newcomer (and Taylor Swift backup dancer) Jan Ravnik. You can read more about that alleged st-fit HERE.

Yes, let's do exactly that:

Same source, different article -  On Tuesday, an insider told The US Sun she’s “pulling out all the stops” to win and has become “obsessed”:

“This isn’t about a trophy, it’s about finally stepping out of Alec’s shadow. She sees this as her time to shine, and she’s even asking Alec to try to get his celebrity friends in the audience to cheer her on.” …

According to the insider, the mom-of-seven is starting to go full diva, requesting to rehearse in a private studio with a mirrored wall so she can “focus on her aura.” Alrighty then…The 41-year-old has also reportedly banned fluorescent lighting from her dressing room to avoid killing the vibe.

But her dissatisfaction doesn’t end there… Rob Shuter revealed in his Naughty But Nice Substack that a source told him she’s upset about being paired with Gleb! They said she fully “lost it” when she heard the news she was with a show vet! Why? Because she she wanted to be paired with newcomer Jan Ravnik, who served as a dancer on Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour. She felt like he’s the hot new thing — and more likely to win. Jan was paired with Secret Lives of Mormon Wives star Jen Affleck instead, and Hilary allegedly went full Boston when she heard:

“Hilaria went ballistic. She’s furious producers gave Jan to Jen Affleck. She thinks her chances of winning are now dead before rehearsals even begin.”

Finally, back to that first article:

But there’s apparently more! Much more!

Insiders at the show told DailyMail.com on Tuesday that all hell is breaking loose, with one declaring:

“This season is a st show.”

OMG what?! Why?? Apparently because of the celebs they chose! The source claimed:

“They chose a few stars — and I use that term loosely — who just don’t want to put in the work. Some just don’t seem as committed as others have in the past.”

OK, DWTS. You win, ABC. You've got me right where you want me, Disney. 

Contestants who are such "Stars" that they were sitting around with nothing to do when their agent's phone rang and their schedule's were totally free? Check. 

Alec Baldwin's wife from Boston who pretends to be from Spain because it's sounds so much more continental and sophisticated than being a Masshole? Getting to hear her lapse in and out of her fake Spanish accent? Knowing she's making more demands than Beyonce's contract riders despite the fact her only talent is getting impregnated by a talented actor? Realizing she's driving everyone on the staff insane with her "ballistic" meltdowns as she's losing power struggles to someone from Mormon Wives? 

Count me right the fook in. I prefer my Reality TV with an extras side of Reality. And it doesn't get any realer than what happens when F-list "celebrities" act like they deserved to get their boots licked on a dancing show.