BANG WARS: Bonnie Blue Returns Serve On Lily Phillips "Skydiving BJ Stunt" By Creating Her Own Bang Bus To Film A "University Tour Around The UK"

It's been a quiet summer for Lily Phillips & Bonnie Blue but their BANG WARS seem to be heating back up just in time for The Autumn Wind. Which we know, is a pirate. 

And much like the pirates of yore, Ms. Blue & Ms. Phillips can't stop plundering the streets with reckless abandon. Along with a thirst seemingly unable to be truly quenched. Of course that could possibly be from being riddled with scurvy or a number of STDs, but I like to think it's just because of their love of the game. 

After all, in this digital age, #content is KING. And whether you agree with them or not, they've clearly delivered that in spades. All while pulling off stunts Jenna Jameson could have never dreamed of. NO OFFENSE. But after they both banged 1000 random dudes in a day and invaded a college spring break in Cancun, the well was running a little dry in the year of our lord 2025. 

Realistically speaking, how much farther could they push the envelope at this point? 

Well after a brief summer hiatus, Lily returned to proclaim her next feat would be making a guy cum whilst skydiving. Inspiring!

Thus, the wizard duel using sleeve of wizard was BACK ON. You best believe Bonnie Blue didn't hear no bell other than the Fucking Bell, and ended up crafting her very own branded Bangmobile. Truthfully I'm not quite sure how to accurately judge whether a custom sex van with your face & branding on it defeats a Skydive BJ, but it does feel like a strong retort in the interim. 

To quote Wayne Campbell & Garth Algar… GAME ON!

What a world indeed. It's too bad Glenny Balls isn't here anymore, otherwise we'd be able to get a full investigation into how the hell this is actually happening. But I will say, before you throw your stones at Bonnie consider this… She is RICH rich now. 

Maybe the juice is worth the squeeze after all?

Maybe not. Who fuckin' knows. If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times. I don't care about any of this. I only yearn for pageviews. The #content game is a dirty business, there's no denying that. But we are all in this together, so thanks for the click. 

My only advice for Bonnie & Lily would be… Make sure you're sucking on more than just crisp choades out there. Work in an orange or two, and definitely some lemon & limes while you're at it. Scurvy is a nasty way to go matey. 

Stay safe out there ladies! And don't forget to tip your Jizz Janitors. They're the real heroes.