Patriots Preseason Game 3: The Summer Ends on a Low Note and I Couldn't Be Happier

I tell myself this every single time this team lines up in a game that means something, a game means nothing, or is just a practice, but today I mean it.

I'm going to keep this brief.

Quite simply, Mike Vrabel may have just been responsible for the worst product the NFL has ever produced. And no, I'm not forgetting about the Colts' animal scat pretzel:

He treated this final fauxball game the way it deserves to be treated. Like he's running a state agency after noon the Friday before Labor Day Weekend. He emptied the place out except for a skeleton crew, told them to lock up when they leave, and sent everyone else out to beat the traffic to the Cape. The way it was meant to be. And it had the added bonus of wasting the time and money of all the Giants' season ticket holders. So he did the work of the angels there.

And all that mattered was the smile on Vrabel's face as he went across the field to shake hands after. (Yes, I was still watching that mess. I do, and do, and do for you kids. And ask nothing in return.) No one on the Patriots side got hurt. And just to give you my annual history lesson on this, in 1989 a potential playoff contender lost DT Garin Veris, S Ronnie Lippett, and Hall of Famer Andre Tippett for the season in their final exhibition game. One starter at all three levels of the defense. As a result they went 5-11, got Ray Berry fired, and the following year went 1-15 under Rod Rust. Let's just be grateful history didn't repeat itself and ignore the score.

This wasn't a dress rehearsal; it was an audition for every roster bubble hopeful and nothing more. This was a Community Theater production of The Sound of Music where they'd already cast Maria, the Von Trapps and the nuns, and were just looking for extras to play the party guests, the people at the folk festival, and some random Nazis. So here are a few impressions from watching this dog's breakfast of a pretend game:

--The most interesting part of any game where your coach is trying not to play anyone is seeing who are the anyones who actually have to play. Once again, Kyle Dugger was out there at the end of the game, surrounded by guys who'll all be filling out the "Salary Desired: $___" line on job applications soon. And again, his talent stood out among them:

In addition he broke up two passes and had six solo tackles. Which would be impressive if impressiveness wasn't measured by standing on the sidelines in a long sleeve Patriots tee. One can only assume that because he's limited to a Big Nickel role as a downhill, fun force, in-the-box safety, he's not versatile enough to be system fit in Vrabel's new scheme. That he's a vestigial organ leftover from Belichick's defense, and being showcased. If that is the case, Dugger has to have added some value to the ROI Eliot Wolf can get for him. You hope so. He's been among their best players over the course of his career and could easily be a Pro Bowler for the right team. 

--Same with Anfernee Jennings, except he didn't see the field at all. Which is odd given the fact he got significant reps in the 2nd half of the first two games. Making you wonder if he might make the roster after all, despite rumors to the contrary. But that seems like a stretch, given that he's more of that big Rob Ninkovich type. That Jersey Barrier you put on the end of your line to reroute traffic back toward the middle. Which doesn't fit the way Vrabel has stocked that position with smaller, more quick-twitch edge rushers like Harold Landry. 

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--What was more curious than either of those was the fact Keion White was on the field right up until halftime. As recently as two weeks ago, I'd have thought he was a mortal lock to be a starter. But the guy who seems to have leapfrogged him on the depth chart is K'Lavon Chaisson, who's the same age as White, but comes with way more NFL experience. As well as way more developed set of moves. At 285 pounds, White is very much an overpowering bull rusher. Whereas Chaisson is 30 lbs lighter and has shown himself to be much more of a pain in the ass to block. When you're a hammer like White, every blocker is a nail. Chaisson is a multitool. Which of them takes the field against the Raiders in two weeks will be the most interesting question on this defense.

--Aside from those positions, there's not really much else to say. There weren't too many impact players to be found. Marte Mapu, who has flashed at times as a depth LB got reps and looked like a depth LB. The secondary was manned by guys like this year's Mr. Irrelevant Kobee Minor and Miles Battle, each of whom got pretty well picked apart by Jaxson Dart. Which might have the benefit of giving Giants fans false hope for their future, which would be a pure good. 

--Offensively, there's reason to be worried about the O-line depth. But then again, there's never not a good time to worry about that. It was a lot of familiar names who were in and out of the worst starting five in football last year. Demontrey Jacobs. Sidy Sow. Vederian Lowe.  Caeden Wallace. And Cole Strange, who played some center and picked up a holding call where he got beat badly on a swim move and had no other choice but to make the tackle and save Ben Woodridge's life. The most mission critical task between now and Sunday the 7th will be to put together a winning poker hand of starters, and hope they don't have to draw too many cards as we go along.

--As far as Wooldridge, I don't know if a stat line of 10/20, 82 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT, 56.7 made any of the producers of this play jump and yell that he's got the part:

But then again, he's almost 26 years old. And he was surrounded by other guys just trying to get a shot. He helped himself with this nice back shoulder throw to Jeremiah Webb:

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But don't be at all surprised to see the Pats pick up a guy once everyone starts releasing their 3rd- and 4th-string QBs. 

--One guy for sure that did himself no favors was Javon Baker. He took 35 snaps, which was 59% of the team's total. But you wouldn't have known it from the fact he was targeted twice and made zero catches. Now might be a good time for him to get hurt like Ja'Lynn Baker and hope the rookie wideout Class of '24 can try again in '26. Third time's the charm.

--Speaking of which, here's hoping Vrabel can find the rat in his outfit:

And that it goes better for the whole organization than it did for this boss:

Two weeks and two days sone of the most successful offseasons in forever comes to a close. Let's kick it off, already.