Report: Howard Stern Found Out His Show is Canceled From a News Alert

8/08/2025 2:45 PM

Randy Holmes. Getty Images.

"For over a thousand years, Roman conquerors returning from the wars enjoyed the honor of a triumph, a tumultuous parade. In the procession came trumpeters and musicians and strange animals from the conquered territories, together with carts laden with treasure and captured armaments. The conqueror rode in a triumphal chariot, the dazed prisoners walking in chains before him. Sometimes his children, robed in white, stood with him in the chariot, or rode the trace horses. A slave stood behind the conqueror, holding a golden crown, and whispering in his ear a warning:
That all glory is fleeting."
-The final lines of the move Patton

That eternal truth has perhaps never been on display as much as it has this week. After we've learned the man who put a golden crown on his own head and declared himself King of All Media has been dethroned:

And if this report is to be believed, the end of his reign came in the most humiliating way imaginable (emphasis mine):

Daily Mail - Howard Stern 's 95-strong staff had only one goal in mind when they gathered for a 'team building' bash in Manhattan on Tuesday afternoon … ahead of the 20th season of the show on SiriusXM, starting September 2. Their 71-year-old boss was a world away from Midtown's Spin bar, instead chilling at the $21 million Southampton pile he has spent most of his time since Covid.
At the staff bash, a senior producer gave a heartfelt speech, thanking the team for their hard work and claiming 'bigger, better guests' and 'the best radio we can do' would follow Stern's September return. By 5.30pm … the lifechanging the bombshell dropped: a news alert claimed Stern was on the verge of walking away from SiriusXM altogether because the station couldn't come close to meeting his financial demands for a new contract.
'The mood changed quickly. No one knew this was coming… and we couldn't get any answers,' one stunned insider said. Repeated calls to executive producer Gary Dell'Abate went unanswered. What staff didn't know was the bombshell came as a shock to Stern himself, who received it via a Google Alert as he finished dinner after a walk on the beach. His famous friends were quick to call, with Stern allegedly avoiding calls from actress and comedian, Ali Wentworth, and Jimmy Fallon.
He did, however, pick up the phone when longtime friend Jimmy Kimmel rang. 'First I'm hearing of it,' was all a reportedly stunned Stern could manage. Multiple sources confirmed Stern decided to make an 'emergency show' on Wednesday morning to quell concerns he was finished. Instead of addressing reports about the Howard Stern show's future, he spoke at length to Metallica's Lars Ulrich, another close friend. When he signed off, he assured listeners he'd be back on September 2. …
Some insiders claim he was set to ink a short one-to-two-year deal; while others say he's frustrated by Sirius's heavy backing of rival host, Andy Cohen. What's making staff extra concerned is the absolute silecnce from 'How come Sirius hasn't outright denied it?'

Big, if true. Because this would be an undignified end to one of the most consequential, pioneering, legendary careers in the history of broadcasting. One that did nothing less than change the entire culture. Going from the absolute pinnacle of your industry to a finding out you'll be out of a job soon from the same Google Alert every other American got is a long, precipitous fall from grace, indeed. With a loud at the bottom.

Like I said the other day, Stern is a guy who survived it all. His bosses trying to fire him. Don Imus telling him to fuck off:

The religious right trying to get him off the air. People on the left accusing him of sexism and racism. Advertiser boycotts. FCC fines. And the more he took withering fire from all directions, the taller he stood as the bullets bounced off him. And often deflected back to hit the ones who fired the shots. What didn't kill him only made him stronger.

He ended up supplanting Imus as the No. 1 DJ in New York. He got syndicated nationally. There are people in the radio industry who'll tell you he kept FM stations in major markets in business just because they ran his show in drive time. That's countless jobs being saved just because working people driving to and for their jobs wanted to hear Stern humiliate his employees throw baloney slices at women's mayonnaise-covered asses.

Stern inspired his listeners to create comedy that was better than anything you'd hear on other radio or TV shows. Some Phony Phone Calls were diabolically ingenious. Two come quickly to mind.

During a live report from LA after a major earthquake, CNN put on a seismologist who talked for a full minute about the impact of the quake before slipping in a "Baba Booey." His name was "Dr. Tremors," and they still put him straight through to their news anchor without checking.

The best one though, was during the coverage of the OJ Simpson low speed chase. As the sun set and the news helicopters hovered over OJ's house in Brentwood, ABC News put on someone claiming to be Simpson's next door neighbor, who had a visual on the entire scene. And the guy started talking in a preposterous accent. Jump to the 1:00 mark for his "Baba Booey," followed by an indignant Al Michaels letting that dumbass Peter Jennings know "that was a totally farcical call":

Stern had the caller on. And he said he never imagined he's actually get through, so he had to make up the accent on the spot. And added "If I order a pizza on the phone, they take down my number to make sure I'm not scamming them. But ABC News put me right through." Again, Howard Stern got this out of his audience. He was nothing less than the leader of a cultural movement that spanned decades.

Then there was the Channel 9 show, which gave him a whole new medium for entertaining and offending. With skits like "Homeless Howiewood Squares," with an active Klansman as the center square:

Then came the videos like Butt Bongo Fiesta. A PPV New Year's Eve special. His insane MTV Awards entrance as Fartman. His books. The movie Private Parts. Then his paradigm-shifting move to satellite radio, that brought subscribers by the millions. Everything Stern touched turned, not just to 24K gold, but to unobtanium.

To now? This. Finding out he'll be unemployed soon. And the thing that finally did in Howard Stern was, unexpectedly, Howard Stern. The coroner's report on this should list the cause of death as "Career suicide." He came to hate the person he was, the empire he built, and, we can infer, the very audience that hero worshiped him for it.

He went from the devoted husband and suburban dad who could ogle porn stars because like all his listeners, he was allowed to look, but couldn't touch.

He went from hero of the working man to demanding that everyone get Covid shots, whether they trusted them or not.

He went from the guy who stayed on the air on 9/11 to one who built a studio in his Hamptons mansion and refused to leave.

He went from the fearless iconoclast for whom no subject was off limits to scheduling an "emergency show" the next morning to address the hot-button question on everyone's mind: What is Lars Ulrich up to?

He went from the guy who started and won every culture war, to the guy who started fights he could not win, because he was engaging in asymmetrical warfare:

And in the end - assuming this is, in fact the end, which I am - he wasn't even deemed worth a phone call from the bosses who paid him as much as $2 billion over the last 20 years.

How the mighty have fallen. I say again, the King of All Media is dead. Long live the King.