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Ed Sheeran Hiring A Security Team To Fight Off "Grabby" Female Fans Is A Reminder That Being Famous/Able To Play The Guitar Is The Best

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Daily Mail- Just days ago, British crooner Ed Sheeran announced his split from model girlfriend Athina Andrelos. Pair that with his stellar music career and you’ve got yourself a recipe for female fan-demonium. The 24-year-old Thinking Out Loud singer has revealed that to fight the overwhelming barrage of estrogen in his life, he’s hired professional help. Ed told The Sun newspaper on Monday: ‘I’ve been given a security guard, for the first time in four years. ‘It started getting a little bit grabby. I don’t mind if people ask politely but if someone grabs you and pulls you…’ While touring Down Under this month, Ed’s been met with an onslaught on eager female fans wanting to get within arms reach of the British star. During his visit however, the bachelor only had desires to hang out with one person of the female variety, and that was 21-year-old Victoria’s Secret model Barbara Palvin.

 

 

I’ll make this quick because you already know what I’m about to tell you is 300% true.  This is just a refresher course.  Look at Ed Sheeran.  Really look at him.  That’s an ugly mother fucker.  I know one when I see one because I’m an ugly mother fucker too.  I can spot them from a mile away.  He’s ugly.  He’s also the guy who just broke up with his smokeshow girlfriend, he might already be dating a Victoria’s Secret model and had to hire a separate security team to stop female fans from grabbing his dick everywhere he goes.  So what’s the difference between me and him?  Well that’s pretty simple.  He’s famous/can sing/can play the guitar.  That’s it.  Those are the only differences between ugly ass Ed Sheeran and ugly ass blogger Trent.  We don’t look the same, no, but we both have the ugly on us.  It’s covering every inch of us.  He’s just able to distract people from that ugliness by writing a smoking hot fire jam like Thinking Out Loud that floods the basement of every chick who hears it.  I try and distract people from my ugliness with jokes on the internet and all that happens is……well nothing.  Literally nothing happens in terms of females.  Girls sure aren’t trying to grab my dick when I go to the grocery store.  Being good at guitar and singing is the fastest way to be ugly and have it not matter at all for a guy.  You already knew that but I just wanted to remind you.