C U Next Halloween

As per yesterday’s NYPost, Italian fashion house Fendi is selling a $990 fur shawl that has people up in arms for 2 reasons:

1) It uses real fox fur.

2) It looks like a vagina.

I personally don’t give a fuck about foxes… I say skin ‘em all.  My only issue was with the $990 price tag.  With Halloween rapidly approaching this seemed like an easy-peasy costume idea, but I couldn’t spend a grand on it in good conscience.  Luckily I found a cheap knockoff in Chinatown.

Critics are saying that wearing this particular scarf gives the impression that your being born as your head pops out of the canal, but my perfectly shaped bald head protruding through the top of the hole has a look that is organically “clitoral” (which I have never said before), so I now just need a matching “rosewood” colored catsuit that I rub down with the inside of an old tuna can, and my Kim Kardashian costume is all set.

And my wife is going as Ray-J (once we find some brown dye)…

Take a report.

-Large

Fendi’s $990 shawl looks like a furry vagina